Fanfiction Big Trouble for a Big Koopa

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Raptor Jesus

Earl of Phantomhive

Ash. What an awful place. Sure, the Mushroom Kingdom was a complete trashhole (in Bowser's oh so humble and non biased opinion), but this place was somehow worse. It stunk to high heaven, there were destroyed buildings everywhere, and to make things worse this was the site of a Murder Game which apparently had no survivors.

Though, the Koopa King couldn't complain too much. He was one of the most feared crime bosses in Ash, or according to him the most feared crime boss in all of Ash.

On this day, Bowser was sitting in a nice throne he bought, which was placed right in the middle of his office. Allegedly, one of his men had been talking bad about him behind his back, making fun of the fact that he had lost in the most recent fight club match.

bowser_copy.png

"Oh, go on, Mr. Comedian! I'm just dying to hear the rest of your hilarious story!" The Koopa King exclaimed sarcastically. The thug, on the other hand, was practically shaking before the mighty turtle.

"I-I meant nothin' by it, boss! Really, it was all fun and games! Right Carl?" The thug asked, gesturing to a nearby thug. The thug in question simply shook his head, not really wanting to get involved in all this mess.

"Just a joke, huh?" Bowser asked quietly before leaning forward. "I gotta joke for ya, chump. Wanna hear it?" The mooc just sat there quietly for a few seconds. "That question wasn't rhetorical."

"Y-yes sir.." He finally managed to stammer out.

"What did the fearful and handsome crime boss say to his worthless and disrespectful thug?"

"W-what?" Before finishing the joke, Bowser stood up and blew a large amount of fire toward the thug in question. "AHHHH!!!!" He yelled as he ran around the room screaming because he's an idiot and apparently had never heard of stop drop and roll.

"Yer fired. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" The other thugs in the room just sat and watched in horror as their fellow comrade was burning alive, having fallen to the ground now. The only sounds that could be heard from him were very faint, weak whimpers. Rolling his eyes, Bowser stood up from his throne and stomped on the thug, killing him instantly. "YOU CHUMPS'RE SUPPOSED TO LAUGH!!" He yelled, earning forced out laughs from the other thugs in the room. "That's better." He said before sitting back down on his throne.

"Now let's address an important issue within our gang. Someone here is a rat. They've been feedin' our info to them wimps at the Coalition. So... I suggest that one'a you comes clean before you end up like Jimmy over there." Bowser said, gesturing to the charred body in the middle of the room. "Nobody, huh? Well... looks like I'm gonna have to pummel each one' a you wimps until whoever you are eventually squeals."

Suddenly, one of the men tugged out his weapon and aimed it at Bowser. "Bowser, under the authority of the Coalition, you are under arrest!" This of course caused the actual loyal thugs in the room to train their guns on the traitor, prompting Bowser to hold up a hand and approach the undercover Coalition agent.

"You'n what army?" He asked. Literally as soon as he said that, dozens of Coalition agents burst into the room and trained their guns on either Bowser or his thugs.

"Hmph... well played." Bowser said as he put his hands up. Of course, this was merely a ruse, as Bowser soon turned around and slit the traitor's throat with his claws. Before he knew it, all hell had broke loose and members from both sides were firing at each other. The Coalition's numbers outmatched Bowser's, however, and soon the Koopa King was the only one left.

"...GRRRRRAAAAAH!!!!" He yelled before just charging into the flurry of agents, knocking them out of the way with his large size alone as he ran out of the lair in an attempt to escape. This attempt was futile, however, as literally hundreds (or even thousands) of agents had already surrounded the base, each of them having their weapons trained on Bowser.

"Bowser, we have you surrounded! Do not attempt to flee, or we will use lethal force!" An unnamed soldier yelled via megaphone. A quick glance around revealed that they were equipped with weapons like rocket launcher's and machine guns.

"...Crap." Bowser said before putting his hands up and surrendering. He was soon placed in rather large handcuffs and delivered to the Black Vault.​
 
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