Can't write next to others, how to deal with it?

LucyLu

Active Member
Hey guys!

So I have found a bit of a problem and I'm not sure if it's a problem with my own ideas or if it's a self-esteem thing or something else, so I'd just like to know if this happens to others and what do you do when it does? :3

I have an idea that has been in my head for a long time now, and I'd like to do some world building, but I live together with my girlfriend and sometimes I have another friend stay at our place for days at a time. Whenever I sit close to each of them, especially my partner, I feel like whatever I'm about to write is just bad. Not just bad, but stupid and childish. I always have problems with that in general, but not in the sketching out part, but when I write actual paragraphs/pages and I read them back before editing (which I think is pretty common and natural). And I love this idea, but even now when I look at my mindmaps and timelines, while someone else is sitting next to me, I feel like I'm being choked on it.

Not sure how else to describe it, but that's what's up with me. Any thoughts/experiences/tips? :3
 
Don't think this is just you. I get uncomfortable doing much of anything with someone sitting next to me (or worse hovering behind me and actively paying attention to what I'm doing). This includes writing, artwork, and even playing certain games. It makes me feel put on the spot so to speak :p

Generally when we work on things, it's the finished product we share with people. When people are looking while I'm working, they're not seeing the finished product and that makes me uncomfortable. Like suddenly there's some additional pressure to perfect for other peoples eyes, what isn't even finished yet. I even have trouble writing in google documents with other people in the document seeing my stuff come up as it's written. I end up writing my posts in a notepad document, and then I copy paste it to the google document once it's finished and ready :p

As for tips, I don't have any really since it's not something I ever felt the need to 'fix' so to speak. There's nothing wrong in my mind to being more comfortable writing in your own personal space.
 
I feel the same way. Here's how I do things. For me, it's because I don't want my parents to continuously ask who I'm talking to or whatnot. They used to do that, maybe they still do. It's more buggy and annoying than threat-strikening these days.

Get off my computer and use my mobile. That way, I have a private screen to myself.
 
Oho, believe me when I say you're not alone in that. I have some quote un-quote "cool" friends that visit me irregularly, and I absolutely cannot write with any of them around. I grow sort of an irrational fear that one of them will watch me write over my shoulder and joke about it, which is odd, because I can pursue and joke about any amount of my other "nerdy" passtimes with them around, but not my writing.

Perhaps because it's more personal, the scrutiny would also feel more personal? Maybe it just takes more focus for me to write.

But being naturally very introverted, I don't see it as an issue; it's healthy to have your secrets and your privacy. And for me, writing is a more personal hobby of mine I like to undertake on my own.
 
Right now. Everyone is in bed and I've put a sock on the door. An hour ago, I was sitting in the little yard behind the house with a tablet and wifi-extender. Before that I was on my phone with my earbuds, secluded. It is possible, but not without seeming selfish in my mind.
 
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