- Pronouns
- They/them
Time rant.
It amazes me how our perception of time changes. It truly does. I remember when I was little, how two hours, ONE hour were such a huge amount. Five hours in school, god forbid it, why so long?. I remember waking up at seven am only so i'd have more time. More time to play, more time to live, because I enjoyed it. I enjoyed it at least more than I do now.
Because I think about it now
Two hours? They pass in a second
I could spend two hours thinking of the most useless crap and barely notice the time passing by.
It varies, when you are anxious, when you have fun, when you don’t.
The grip we have on time varies, you let go when you get distracted but when you hold it close. And want it to pass, it becomes sludge and heavy.
Makes me thing, that time is petty.
Time doesn't wait
And if we ever met time, as a person, they'd be the loneliest individual we’d ever met.
Because as much as it wanted to hold on to something, the moment that something enjoyed its time spent with time, it'd pass quicker and like sand, like water, slide through our fingers.
And I think of myself now
How long has it been, a year?
2017, 2018
And it doesn't seem that long
A year, if I had been told I had to wait a year for something in the past. If I had been told as a child to wait for a month, for a day
Id have cried out again and again how much I couldn't wait
And then perhaps, that's why time holds on to us when we are younger.
Perhaps we are more aware of its gears. Children are both annoying and strange.
I was annoying, you were annoying, it's just how it is. And also precious.
But now im told something is happening in a year
In a month
And I might panic
Because HELL, it's almost here
It's not enough time
It's never enough, because time lets us go
The older we get, the initial shine wears off
And we stop being entertaining as we grow, and we gain more interest from life and space and other things.
So we are given the experiences
Without them lasting much.
Because the experiences themselves are willing. But time is not interested, not anymore.
Therefore, immortality.
How could we not go insane when given all the time we want?
How could we not long for it?
I do,
You do.
But then once we were given that unreachable present
We'd crumple and break under the weight of our experiences
The bonds, the friendship
We'd need to be social, interact and live
For nothing
Because if we danced with time we couldn't hold on to other things.
The moment you enter the current indefinitely, life and space and abstract concepts will get jealous.
And they will punish you, and bring you back.
Until you don't want time anymore
Until you don't even want them anymore either, because who could forget such a thing?
And then comes death
Unknown and calm and unavoidable
It opens its arms wide
And welcomes you into its breast. And you don't know what might come after if there is something at all.
But because life, abstraction and space have punished you, and you don't want to hold on to time, you'll leap into death’s embrace.
You'll rush towards it, because its your goal, because you are tired
And death is a bed
A bed with heavy sheets
Where you can rest forever, and sink
And we say yes, because we don't want the rest.
It makes one wonder, how long would it take?
How much punishment can you take?
How much can you bleed?
It, of course, depends on the individual.
And perhaps some
Not many
Could learn
Learn to dance with time and life and death at the same time
And then no one is forgotten, no one gets jealous and no one meets their end.
But the assumption it'd take.
That nothing you got in this world will last you forever, so enjoy it while it lasts and then let it go.
And then the challenge
To see it age and perish
And to actually let go
If you managed that
You might as well become a god.
You could call yourself superior because you don't lose your pace.
You'll come walk by my side while I can, and when I trip and fall, you'd leave me there.
When I lose my strength to keep walking, you'd keep walking without a double take.
You might grow bitter and alone
But you'd be eternal
Makes one wonder if you would forget.
How long can you live before you forget your childhood?
Your parents?
Your friends?
How long can you look back into the past?
Can you allow yourself the grief of doing so?. Perhaps not.
It is possible that if you looked back you'd stop, lose the pace, trip and fall like the others.
And let yourself close your eyes.
And lie on death's bed.
I think I am done,
The end.
It amazes me how our perception of time changes. It truly does. I remember when I was little, how two hours, ONE hour were such a huge amount. Five hours in school, god forbid it, why so long?. I remember waking up at seven am only so i'd have more time. More time to play, more time to live, because I enjoyed it. I enjoyed it at least more than I do now.
Because I think about it now
Two hours? They pass in a second
I could spend two hours thinking of the most useless crap and barely notice the time passing by.
It varies, when you are anxious, when you have fun, when you don’t.
The grip we have on time varies, you let go when you get distracted but when you hold it close. And want it to pass, it becomes sludge and heavy.
Makes me thing, that time is petty.
Time doesn't wait
And if we ever met time, as a person, they'd be the loneliest individual we’d ever met.
Because as much as it wanted to hold on to something, the moment that something enjoyed its time spent with time, it'd pass quicker and like sand, like water, slide through our fingers.
And I think of myself now
How long has it been, a year?
2017, 2018
And it doesn't seem that long
A year, if I had been told I had to wait a year for something in the past. If I had been told as a child to wait for a month, for a day
Id have cried out again and again how much I couldn't wait
And then perhaps, that's why time holds on to us when we are younger.
Perhaps we are more aware of its gears. Children are both annoying and strange.
I was annoying, you were annoying, it's just how it is. And also precious.
But now im told something is happening in a year
In a month
And I might panic
Because HELL, it's almost here
It's not enough time
It's never enough, because time lets us go
The older we get, the initial shine wears off
And we stop being entertaining as we grow, and we gain more interest from life and space and other things.
So we are given the experiences
Without them lasting much.
Because the experiences themselves are willing. But time is not interested, not anymore.
Therefore, immortality.
How could we not go insane when given all the time we want?
How could we not long for it?
I do,
You do.
But then once we were given that unreachable present
We'd crumple and break under the weight of our experiences
The bonds, the friendship
We'd need to be social, interact and live
For nothing
Because if we danced with time we couldn't hold on to other things.
The moment you enter the current indefinitely, life and space and abstract concepts will get jealous.
And they will punish you, and bring you back.
Until you don't want time anymore
Until you don't even want them anymore either, because who could forget such a thing?
And then comes death
Unknown and calm and unavoidable
It opens its arms wide
And welcomes you into its breast. And you don't know what might come after if there is something at all.
But because life, abstraction and space have punished you, and you don't want to hold on to time, you'll leap into death’s embrace.
You'll rush towards it, because its your goal, because you are tired
And death is a bed
A bed with heavy sheets
Where you can rest forever, and sink
And we say yes, because we don't want the rest.
It makes one wonder, how long would it take?
How much punishment can you take?
How much can you bleed?
It, of course, depends on the individual.
And perhaps some
Not many
Could learn
Learn to dance with time and life and death at the same time
And then no one is forgotten, no one gets jealous and no one meets their end.
But the assumption it'd take.
That nothing you got in this world will last you forever, so enjoy it while it lasts and then let it go.
And then the challenge
To see it age and perish
And to actually let go
If you managed that
You might as well become a god.
You could call yourself superior because you don't lose your pace.
You'll come walk by my side while I can, and when I trip and fall, you'd leave me there.
When I lose my strength to keep walking, you'd keep walking without a double take.
You might grow bitter and alone
But you'd be eternal
Makes one wonder if you would forget.
How long can you live before you forget your childhood?
Your parents?
Your friends?
How long can you look back into the past?
Can you allow yourself the grief of doing so?. Perhaps not.
It is possible that if you looked back you'd stop, lose the pace, trip and fall like the others.
And let yourself close your eyes.
And lie on death's bed.
I think I am done,
The end.
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