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Not caring=/=saying that something isn't an urgent issue that deserves major attention at the moment.

Have a universal rule-set and enforce it, easiest thing. And simply avoid people whose ocs are mary sues, if you cannot, call them out on the annoying behavior. But this is too wide of a question, metagaming, mary sueness and god-modding can manifest in a number of ways and there is no single...

Depends, i personally enjoy it more when my character bends the narrative through their effort than having a center point just handed to them on a silver platter.