How Green Becomes Wood

Dark looked down at the teenager and then wrapped his other arm around him too. He figured he might as well, Alec seemed like he needed it. He was breathing deeply and calmly, and his heartbeat, if it could be heard where Alec's head was resting, was slow.

Daizi sighed from her spot on the hospital bed. She hated how the room smelled. She hated she had yelled at Xander. She missed her own bed, and her dog, and obviously she knew she would be going home in just a little while, but she really hated being in the hospital. She ran her hands over her baby bump, praying she'd be a better parent by the time she gave birth, and she thought about how beautiful the sound of the heartbeat was. The room was silent, except for the obligatory beeps of machinery, for a while, but then she broke it saying, "I want a home birth," but she said it in her native tongue.
 
Alec lifted his head briefly at the words, but seeing as he couldn't understand them, he tucked his head back down. He wondered idly if this was how a chick felt when it hid under the chicken's wings. If so, the chicks really had a good thing going. It was quite cozy here.
 
Dark probably should have expected she would come to that decision, considering how much she hated hospitals, and considering how traumatic her first birth was. But he was still surprised, "Are you... sure?"

"Yes. I want her first moments to be somewhere warm and comforting, not somewhere like this. And if I have to go through all of that, I want to be comfortable too. In a place I'm familiar with," They both spoke quietly, and Daizi still had her back to them, or at least as well as she could, "and, you know... I keep thinking, regardless of where I give birth, there's a chance I'll die, my mom did, so if that happens, I'd definitely rather spend my last moments in our bed. Not in a place like this.

He shifted, uncomfortable with the turn the conversation took, "You are not going to die," His chest vibrated whenever he spoke, "and I am really uncomfortable entertaining that possibility right now."


Daizi rolled onto her back, since with the wires she couldn't roll to face them directly, "Okay... we don't have to... But are you okay with it?"

"Darling, if it is what will make you feel more comfortable, then I think it is a great idea." Dark replied. He would have reached out to her if he wasn't still holding Alec so tenderly. He was half convinced the boy was going to fall asleep right there, and he'd have to carry him to the car.
 
Alec did feel almost relaxed enough to sleep. Which made him sit up and try to shake himself awake. "Do you think we can go home soon?" he asked cautiously when he felt the conversation he couldn't understand had paused.
 
"I hope so..." Daizi replied, "we need to find Xander." Never once had she put him entirely out of her mind.

Not too long after this conversation, a nurse came in, asked Daizi a few questions, and then gave her (who in turn gave to Dark) her discharge papers. Then finally, the IV was pulled from her arm. She scuttled off to the bathroom to change into her own clothes and then all they needed to do was collect the other twin before going home.
 
"Oh, I think I know where he is," Alec said, grabbing his backpack. "I can go get him for you, Professor. I'll be right back. I just have to ask the nurse which door to use." He hurried out, backpack slung over one shoulder, and went on the hunt for his brother.

Xander stood in the tiny smoking area allotted off one of the hospital entrances. It seemed that whoever had planned and set it up and done their absolute best to make it as uncomfortable as possible. Still, he stayed leaning against one of the posts, idly puffing away at a cigarette. It was anyone's guess where it had come from considering there was no one else there.

"Xander!" Alec called from the doorway. "We can leave now. Come on! Everything is fine now."

Xander sighed and stubbed out the cigarette, tossing it away in the provided ashtray that took up a third of the tiny patio. He doubted everything was fine. Not after the way he'd spoken to Daizi. If he was Dark, he would toss him out on his ear. Oh well. Might as well go face the music. He brushed off his shirt and followed Alec. Alec didn't say anything, asked no questions as they headed back down hospital hallways toward the room where Alec had last seen Dark and Daizi.
 
Once alone, Dark walked over to Daizi and without a word hugged her tightly. When he finally let go, he rubbed her belly, and with his subtle smile said, "She has a very strong heartbeat and is very active."

A grin spread across Daizi's face, the first time she had smiled since she fainted, "I know!" They had never heard their baby described like that, not once. She had almost cried while listening to the heartbeat, and in retrospect she wished she had recorded it, but she didn't think so far ahead.

When the twins came back in the room, though, she scrunched up her face, "Were you standing in the smoking section?"
 
"I'll get a cab home," Xander said quietly, realizing the smell still clung to him. Normally there was no one to notice, but of course Daizi would with her combination of astute smell and pregnancy. He didn't want to make her sick again.

"I have a spare shirt of yours in the bag," Alec said brightly.
 
"No, I don't want to make you do that. We'll just roll down the windows," Daizi said, folding up the blanket, "but when we get home you should shower. Cigarette smoke is awful, you really shouldn't hang around people who do it, even second-hand smoke can hurt you." She didn't suspect that he had been the one smoking, thankfully, because if she knew, there was no doubt she would go off on him right there, and who knew what a mess that would cause.

Ideally, she would like it if he changed his shirt, but she was so desperate to get home, she didn't want to wait the two minutes it would take to change, so she was already dragging Dark towards the door.
 
Alec was already pulling out the shirt - a simple black one - and tossed it to Xander. Xander peeled out of his shirt there in the room and tossed it to Alec, pulling on the new one before Daizi had even fully made it out the door. Alec balled up the shirt, slipped it into a plastic bag, and stuffed it into his backpack as they walked. He had it zipped up and on his shoulder as they walked down the neverending hallway. The entire affair was as smooth as a well-practiced ballet dance.
 
The moment they stepped outside the hospital doors, Daizi took a deep breath and shook out her hands, "I'm showering too, when we get home, I smell like hospital, I feel disgusting. Dark, you need to shower too, I'm not getting into bed with you if you smell like hospital."

"That is... understandable," Dark replied, hoping the twins understood that she meant just sleeping in bed not anything more graphic. He opened Daizi's car door for her and they each got into the car. Once everyone was piled in, he drove back to their home.
 
"Hospital smell is at least cleaner than dumpster smell," Alec muttered, wrinkling his nose and staring out the window. "I never want to eat Chinese again. And why is it always Chinese?"

"Because the noodles look like worms and nobody wants to eat worms," Xander said. He opened the door the moment the car stopped and headed into the house.

"Spaghetti looks like worms," Alec said, following his brother with his backpack.
 
"Hospitals smell like piss and antiseptic," Daizi replied, immediately slipping upstairs as soon as they were out of the car and hopped in the shower, leaving her clothes in a pile on the bedroom floor.

Dark followed her up and picked up her clothes to put them in their hamper. When she was out of the shower, he showered as promised, and after he stood behind her and gently combed out her damp hair.

"I am really glad you are okay," He said, "You scared me."

Daizi reached up behind her to touch him, "I'm sorry."

"It is not your fault, darling, you do not need to apologize." Dark replied, setting the brush down and braiding her hair.

"I feel like there is," She replied, "I feel terrible about all of it. I spend my entire life trying to convince people that I'm an adult and I can take care of myself just fine, and now I'm pregnant and have to work even harder to get people to trust me, and I just go and do something like this and prove that I can't. It's embarrassing, and I'm angry it all happened, and I feel stupid, and more than that, I feel guilty for upsetting everyone. I'm supposed to be stronger than that, you know?"

He lifted a hair-tie and finished her braid, "You expect too much of yourself, I think."

"Maybe..." She chewed on her bottom lip, and then inhaled sharply and confessed to her husband, "I'm worried I'm going to be an awful mother. Xander's mad at me because I 'martyr' myself and, I mean, you heard him, you were there, and like---I just, I try to relate to them and be honest with them ny letting them know how I feel and what what goes on in my mind, so they know that they know I'm doing my best, and I want them to know that I really care but I guess I screwed that up, and I keep thinking, you know, what if I'm tempting fate and I was never meant to--"

She was interrupted by Dark leaning forward and hugging her from behind. He rested his head on her shoulder and said, "Spider, take a breath. When he yelled at you, which, by the way, was not justified, it was because he wants you to be kinder to yourself and focus on yourself more. Don't kill yourself thinking more into it. Anyway, bad mothers don't get this upset wonderinf if they're doing the right thing or not," He kissed the top of her head, "Now, come to bed, you have had a long day."
 
Xander sat in the corner of the room, wedged between the wall and the desk. He leaned his head back, staring up at the window and the view of the sky this angle afforded. He hadn't bothered to shower or change since they got home, choosing instead to go straight to his room and sit.

Alec had showered, and his wet hair looked nearly black as it lay plastered against his head. He came in and squatted in from of Xander. "I'm sure things will be better tomorrow."

"I don't want to talk about it," Xander said flatly.

Alec stood and stepped away to the dresser. He came back after a moment and put a small iPod in his lap, holding up the earbuds. Xander put them in grudgingly, and Alec pushed play before walking away to get ready for bed. Xander leaned back and closed his eyes, almost smiling at the song that started playing. "It's Alright" by Mother Mother came through the tiny speakers, the drums underlining the frustrated, sad, anger in the singer's voice.

Ooh, It's alright, oh
Oh hey, I had a night I had a day
I did one million stupid things
I said one billion foolish things
I'm not okay, I got a baseball bat beside my bed
To fight off what's inside my head
To fight off what's behind my meds
I'm lonely, lost in pain

It's alright, it's okay, it's alright, it's okay
You're not a monster, just a human
And you made a few mistakes
It's alright, it's okay, it's alright, it's okay
You're not gruesome, just human
And you made a few mistakes
It's alright
Ooh, it's okay
Ooh, it's alright, oh

He closed his eyes and fell asleep listening to the song, not realizing it was on repeat until he woke with a start and a kink in his neck three hours later. Wearily, he climbed out of his corner, put away the iPod, and climbed tiredly into bed.


The next morning, Alec scampered down the stairs first, smiling brightly as he hurried to the kitchen. "Good morning! How are you feeling?" he called before even checking that there was anyone in the room.
 
"Good morning," Daizi replied, "I'm feeling okay, thank you." She was sitting in her usual seat at the island counter drinking a cup of tea. She had a meeting at work, so she was in a pencil dress and the tighter material made her first-trimester bump far more obvious than her usual style did. But, to be fair, she was nearly in the second trimester.

"Good morning Alec," Dark said, at the stove, "I hope you got enough sleep, I know we all had a late night."
 
"I'm fully rested, thank you," Alec said happily. "What is for breakfast? Can I help?" He wandered closer to the stove and peered around, trying to see. He didn't get too close to Daizi or look at her directly, instead stealing fast glances.
 
"Today, omelets," Dark said, "and you are welcome to help." He noticed how Alec continued to ignore Daizi, and thought about how eventually he would need to talk to him about it. She couldn't see the way he refused to even really look at her, but they had talked a few times about how Alec seemed so often uncomfortable around her. Daizi kept saying it was fine and that Alec had a right to his feelings, but Dark wasn't quite okay with how poorly it made her feel, especially after their conversation last night. He just wasn't sure how to bring it up.

"Next week, we're going to try shakshuka again, once my medicine has had a chance to really work. You remember it, right? It's the one with the tomatoes and the poached egg on top. I miss it so much." Daizi said. She wasn't on her new medicine yet, Dark was picking it up from the pharmacy after work, but she was really hopeful it would work and she would be free.
 
"Is next week too soon?" Alec asked worriedly. "Maybe week after? Just to let the medicine get into your system or whatever it does? I agree, the shaka-shaka is very delicious!" He never could quite manage to get the name right, even when he was actually trying. Half the time he didn't bother and stuck with the nickname. He edged closer to the stove and tried to figure out how he could help before Dark could tell him, but food was still a mystery to him. Xander was more or less getting the hang of things, but Alec felt that food really did actively hate him.
 
She shrugged, "Either next week or the week after, I guess, I just want to try it before I'm in the second trimester, really test the medicine," She danced her long fingers across her belly, wondering how much the baby was moving at that moment. She could avoid talking directly about the baby when the twins were around, and mostly did, but she couldn't quite keep her hand to herself.

Dark explained what Alec could help with, trusting he could manage it, even though he often made mistakes in the past, and then asked, "Where is your brother? I do not want him to be late."
 
"He said something about needing to finish a last piece of homework that he forgot," Alec said, squinting at the whisk as if it was a magic wand before vigorously applying himself to the task Dark gave him. "He said not to worry if he wasn't down in time for breakfast, he'd be ready to leave, no problem! Oh, that reminds me, I want to do a negative picture for art class, but I don't have any negatives to base it off of and get the colors right. Do you have any negatives?"
 
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