How Green Becomes Wood

Again, Daizi nodded, thinking this through. If she was honest, she wasn't sure if the stock market was a wise way to get a ten-year old to improve his math, she felt like there were alternate options, but what was done was done, and it wouldn't be helpful to make that comment. "Does he have a lot of access to money to trade? Or, at least, did he before this started?" She patted Sally lightly on the arm, hearing the note in her voice, "Have you noticed any other differences? Has anything else happened? I know you went to visit with his grandmother over break."
 
Sally sniffled a little and got herself under control. "We gave him a bit of seed money to get him started, just a small amount, but he has grown it exponentially! He is quite wealthy in his own right now, but he is not spending the money on anything. He's just saving it. I am uncertain how much he has as he has his own bank account and financial privacy, but it is a fair amount. He's been so moody lately. He's not getting proper sleep, he's withdrawn, he doesn't want to go anywhere, and he tested terribly during his finals. He got a B in English, Daizi!" Her tone said this was a huge deal. "This started, I don't know, just before the break, I think. He was asking all sorts of odd questions, especially to his grandmother, and acting very distracted. Oh, Daizi, what if this has been going on much longer and is much worse than I think, but I didn't notice?" Sally asked tearfully.
 
"Okay, hey," Daizi said, putting her teacup down on the table before putting both of her hands on Sally's shoulder, "Breathe, habiti. Not sleeping properly, being withdraw, getting a B in school, that's not uncommon for teenagers, even teenagers who are normally the model for perfect behaviour. When you've tried to talk to him, how have you approached it with him?"
 
"I'm sorry," Sally sniffled, fishing out a handkerchief with one hand to dab at her eyes. "I know this must seem like a huge overreaction to you, but I have never had to deal with this before. He's never been like this before. I cannot escape the fear that somewhere along the way, maybe I messed up." She took a breath to calm down a little. "I would say I - both of us, really - approach it rather frankly. Perhaps that is the problem, but we have always tried to be open with him and with each other and attempt to set an example of communication. He always draws away now, and I feel we are approaching levels of confrontational."
 
"You don't have to apologize," Daizi told her firmly, "He may not be running away from home and getting into fights and all of the sorts of things my boys have done, but it's still hard. I know how hard it is to not know how to reach your kid. But how would you feel if you were sixteen and your parents were being really blunt and forward about the problems you were experiencing? Presuming you were even able to recognize you were having a problem in the first place. Sometimes people need to be coaxed into speaking about it, and sometimes people just aren't ready."
 
"I had not thought about it in that light," Sally admitted thoughtfully. "I thought I was more open and honest in attempting to be blunt, but perhaps I have overdone it in my attempts to not be like my parents. With them, it felt like you needed a translation guide to understand the subtext of everything they said." She heaved a sigh. "That is so often the way, is it not? In attempting to fix the wrongs of the previous generation, you create new wrongs of your own. How would you suggest approaching this in a more delicate manner?"
 
"It's really normal to overcorrect, I think," Daizi agreed with a sigh, wondering how her relationship with her father was going to manifest in how she parented, and knowing how Dark's relationships with his was already such a hurdle for him. "It's a bit tough to say how I would go about it, because it's so unique to the child. With Alec, I can really just sit down and start asking him questions about how school is going to get him talking, and then he really just admits to all of it, unless it's really bad, and then it's a bit more complicated, but most of the time with him, if we just start talking maybe near the topic, or sometimes with something more unrelated, depending on how serious it seems--there's a quote from a song I like that's something along the lines of, things that matter too much to say anyway but lightly--but that doesn't really work with Xander, because he's more defensive. If Dark or I need to talk to him, we need to get him doing something with his hands first, most of the time. We ask him for help cleaning up, or for help cooking or folding laundry... Dark likes to invite both of them out to his shed, I think because it's such a neutral space, and there is a lot to focus on. And it's good for Xander, because he doesn't want to look at you while he is talking about hard things. I don't know Peter well enough to know what is the right way in for him, and we had to figure it out by trial-and-error with the twins."
 
Sally took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "You are right," she agreed. "You are absolutely right. Maybe this thing that's got him so preoccupied, whatever it is, is just too important for him. Maybe he feels he needs to prepare something before he can talk about it." She sipped her tea slowly. "He's saving money for something, and while I refuse to pry into his personal life unless I truly feel it is absolutely necessary, I have caught glimpses of his phone screen when behind him or just as he is setting it down, and it seems he is doing research for something as well." She gave a soft moan. "What if those dratted search engines convinced him he is going to die of some ailment and he is preparing for that?"
 
"Well, I," Daizi replied, patting Sally's knee, "I think that it is never too soon to prepare for the end of life, and I think if that is what he is doing, he will be very relieved when he does not die. But does he seem like the sort of person who would accept a virtual diagnosis without at least asking to see a physical doctor? That's not the impression he's ever given me, so I don't think you have to worry about that possibility. If you want, I can try to talk to my boys about if they've noticed anything weird with him? He might have told them something."
 
"No, no, he is not the sort, but you hear these stories, and they tend to worm into your mind without you even realizing," Sally admitted. She hesitated at Daizi's offer. "I would like to say yes, please ask them, but I worry that may seem like going behind his back. If they are willing to volunteer the information, though, perhaps it is not such a bad thing." She shook her head. "My mother told me I would never experience irrational worry like those of a mother until I became one, and the worst part is knowing that every now and then, the irrational worry is true. Or at least partly true."
 
"I'll ask, but if they don't want to answer, I'll leave it be," Daizi told her, "and I won't ask any follow ups... I never had a mother, so I never recevied much parenting advice... Well, Cooger's mom has told me a bit, here and there, but it feels different coming from your friend's mom, even if you know her pretty well. But you've been a mom longer than I have, so... I don't need to tell you how much time is spent worrying."
 
Sally chuckled and sipped her tea. "I have a few mom friends and relatives, but you are someone I truly trust. You have a different way of looking at things, and how you arrived to have children was, shall we say, unorthodox. You are someone I feel I can come to who will sympathize with my worrying and not either dismiss it out of hand or spiral with me into something worse. I value your advice in all matters, whether I act on it or not. In truth, I am already feeling far better about the whole thing."
 
"Thank you," Daizi said, turning her head slightly away, "I appreciate knowing you view me so highly... I'm glad our sons became friends so we were able to meet. And I'm glad I was able to, hopefully, repay you a little bit of the kidness you've shown me this past year..."

She hummed for a moment and then smiled at Sally brightly, "Did you notice we've been friends for a year, now?"
 
"Oh my goodness, yes! It has been a year!" Sally laughed. "I hadn't even realized. A year of such kindness does go by in a blink, does it not?" She finished her tea and glanced out the window. "Well, I should make my way back home now. Thank you again for letting me come running here with my problems. I do not feel they are solved, but I feel more prepared to face them properly."
 
"It really does," Daizi agreed, stretching, "You're welcome to stay longer, but I understand being ready to go home. If you need anything else, don't hesitate to call or stop by again, we're all home for the summer, now."
 
Sally smiled and picked up the kettle. "Then I would love to walk the garden with you. My grandmother had a garden vaguely similar to yours, and it reminds me of playing there as a child. It was a massive garden that needed a full-time gardener in her employ, but there were some areas she worked on herself until the day she was physically incapable of doing so. Sadly, as much as I love looking at gardens, I have never taken the time to try one for myself."
 
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