How Green Becomes Wood

"He made a full recovery," Dark replied, amused both by the story and by their reaction, "and the odds were, I imagine, astronomical. He was hit right in the face with a goose, so the ride pulls back in, and his face is all bloodied, the women he was riding with, all dressed like goddesses, look horrified, except for one who is laughing while trying to comfort him..." He shook his head, "You should watch the video. You do not see the moment of impact, but you see right before and immediately after."

Daizi froze when Alec so emphatically demand she not move, like a hag being interrupted in the middle of her machinations, "I'm really okay, I spent most of my day at my desk. I'm only in my second trimester. Women have done much more like this than cook dinner." She patted her middle, and would still have stood, but Dark kept his arm around her, "Babe..."

"No, I know, I know, you are fine," Dark murmured, "it is only that, most women do not have the problems you have, so I just think it is better to be cautious... And I have not seen you since this morning, so..." He shifted so he was pressed against her more, "why would I want you to get up so soon after coming home?"

Daizi turned towards him, and then towards Alec again, before sighing and giving into their desires for her, "I guess we can order in, Xander..." She said, allowing her husband to completely envelop her.

"Where would you like?" Dark asked, resting his chin on his wife's shoulder.
 
"Yes, woman have historically and to this day done a lot while like you, but that was usually because they had no choice," Alec pointed out patiently. "How many of those that have no choice would be so very grateful to have a husband who'd dote on them like yours does? Especially at-risk mothers? Just because others have done it doesn't mean that you should, and there's no shame in that. You're doing the better thing by protecting yourself and, more importantly, your baby. Is even the potential risk worth your baby's health just so you can prove to yourself and everyone around you that you are just as capable as we already know you are? Or is it better to take advantage of a few short months and let us baby you because it makes us feel better and safer and more assured about her health?" He kept his voice calm and even, not even one bit upset.

Xander moved away and used his phone to scroll through the possible places to get food. He didn't want to be a part of the conversation, and someone had to think of food, so he made a few notes of the places he thought would most likely appeal to everyone, especially Daizi.
 
"It's just cooking dinner though," Daizi pointed out, annoyed, "I'm not planning to run through the forest to hunt a stag and bring it back here on my shoulders. I'm still an adult, and I think it's only fair that I be treated like one. I've been told my entire life all of the things I can't do, from people who don't know what it's like to be in this body, and I would hope that by this point in my life I could be trusted to know what I am and am not able to do on any given day. You want to baby me, okay, but I'm not a baby, I didn't regress in age just because I'm growing one." She huffed, disentangling herself from Dark's arms, "Cooking dinner or putting dishes away isn't going to hurt my daughter, just like cooking dinner didn't result in a house fire. If I said I'm feeling fine, then I don't know why you can't trust me. It's not about proving anything to anyone, I just want to do the simple daily things that people do, instead of being doubted on my ability to perform them. It's not like I'm on bedrest and I'm trying sneak away to scrub the grout. I was never incompetent because I'm blind, and I haven't become incompetent because I'm pregnant."

She scowled, seeming almost like an agitated cat with its tail twitching and its ears back, but with great effort she took a deep breath and tried to set aside those feelings, because of who she was speaking to. Even though she had never raised her voice, and even though she was really only advocating for herself, it still felt wrong to be so obviously upset with one of the twins. So Daizi exhaled, and some of the frustration cleared from her face, "Look. I know that you're worried about me--about us--but... I know more about what's going on in my body than any of you, and I need that to be respected. Okay?"
 
Alec stood up and started walking away, his tone still calm, but more dismissive this time. "The only one who thinks 'incompetency' and 'Daizi' in same sentence is you. None of us think any of that. You're the one putting words in our mouths thinking we think you're going to burn down the house or do something terrible. We want to take care of you because we love you. We want to try to make things easy for you like you're a queen, but instead of seeing a bunch of people bowing and scraping to their goddess, you insist on seeing nannies fussing over a toddler. You're taking away our joy because of your own desire for independence." He stopped at the bottom of the stairs. "And being the person who twice thought you were going to die because of this baby, no. I don't trust you to know your own body. Loads of people with injuries or illnesses stop treatment too soon because they insist they feel 'fine.' Only, instead of reinjuring a leg, you're putting two lives at risk. I don't see how you can ask me to respect that. So, instead, I'm just going to go to my room and stay out of your way while you do whatever you want regardless of how it affects anyone else." Turning back to the stairs, he clamped his hands to his ears like a child and walked up to his room. He wasn't interested in anything either Dark or Daizi had to say at the moment. He went to his room and closed the door firmly enough they could hear it without exactly slamming it.
 
"But I'm not a goddess," Daizi replied, knowing perfectly well he wasn't listening, "and I don't want to be bowed down to, I just want to be treated like everyone else, and none of you know what it's like to have constantly had to convince people that you aren't broken and that you won't fall apart if the wind blows too hard. None of you know what that's like, because none of you have lived every day in a body that doesn't work right. You don't understand how much I've had to give up on and how much I've had to miss. So yes, I still want to be independent--because if we're talking about joy, what about my joy? I'm the one who needs to carry this thing, and everyone's so concerned about if I'm being physically overburdened, but apparently nobody stops to consider if I'm mentally overburdened, or how it feels to be told every day, again, that I can't do things."

Hearing the door shut, Daizi stood up off the couch, and Dark gently caught her wrist, "Leave him be for right now," he said.

"I wasn't going after him," she said, pulling, not ripping, her arm away, "It's just--the first time I scared him, he didn't know what was going on with me, so it has nothing to do with me 'not knowing my body' and the second time, I was just trying to make it easier--I wanted it to be normal, I was stressed for them because I knew they were upset by it, and the doctor said it was mostly to do with not having enough blood to carry the oxygen. And it's not like--" She stopped herself and wiped her face. It would be wrong of her to say what she had wanted to, so she let it be. Instead she gathered herself together, and in a low, quiet voice said, "I'm just going to be alone for a little while. You can get me when dinner comes. Or, I guess not alone, I'm taking the dog. And..." That sentence she didn't finish, because she knew she didn't need to. There was one person she always took with her. Whistling to Enkidu, she also went upstairs to her bedroom, but her door closed without a sound.

Then, Dark and Xander were alone.
 
Xander glanced at Dark. After a moment, he said, "Well, if those two are off sulking in their rooms, then I guess it's down to us to pick the food choices." He showed Dark his phone. "How does Daizi feel about Thai? There's a lot of spicy, but there's some less spice options for Alec, and you can choose Thai spicy or American spicy."
 
Dark stared up at the stairs, knowing both of them were right in their own way, and hoping both were doing okay behind their shut doors, "Daizi likes thai. She's a big fan of pad thai. But I have never met someone who is not. Do you think Alec is okay?"
 
"He needs a bit to calm down, then he'll want someone to lean on," Xander told him. "He's never cared about anyone like he cares about you two." He shrugged. "I haven't either, and I guess we just don't know what to do with that information."
 
Dark nodded, "And Daizi just needs a good cry, I think...And I understand, not knowing what to do about those sorts of emotions. It is always difficult to navigate. And I am sure somewhere inside Daizi cares about the fuss, it is just difficult, for her."
 
Xander hesitated a bit before saying, "You can go up and see them, if you want. I'll take care of ordering. If you want. I guess one of them wants to be alone, but Alec could maybe use a level head." He would normally have gone up to talk to Alec. Usually, he would have ben up there before anyone could ask. But... he didn't feel like Alec wanted him. At least, not right now. Some pains were still too fresh.
 
"If you think it is what he would like," Dark sighed, standing. He told Xander what he wanted, and then left to go speak to Alec. He might have wondered at Xander not immediately rushing after his brother, but as a rule, Dark trusted that Xander knew his twin better than he or Daizi did, so up he went and knocked lightly at Alec's door.

"Hey," he said, standing outside of it, "I wanted to check on you. And you do not need to worry, I am not angry."
 
Alec wiped his eyes carefully before going and cautiously opening the door a crack. "You aren't?" he asked skeptically. "I thought you would be." He looked past Dark, looking to see if Xander or Daizi was with him. He didn't expect Daizi, but he felt a twinge of disappointment that Xander wasn't there even if he wasn't sure he wanted him to be.
 
"How could I be angry at someone whose only crime is being concerned for the health of my wife and unborn child?" Dark asked delicately, putting his hands in his pockets to seem casual, "Can I come in?" Even though he felt this conversation was important, beyond, perhaps what either twin could recognize it to be, he would not push himself inside.
 
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Alec hesitated for a long moment before stepping back and opening the door more. "Okay," he agreed. He was probably opening himself up to a lecture, but he couldn't bring himself to be so rude as to deny Dark. It was his house, after all.
 
"Thank you," Dark said, coming into the room, and pulling out one of the desk chairs to sit in. He stretched one of his long legs out in front of him, and folded his hands over the knee of the leg he kept bent. He waited a few moments before asking, "How are you? After all of that? You can tell me, I give you my word nothing you say will upset me, and none of it leaves this room. I will not tell her any of it."
 
Alec moved to the bed and sat down, hugging his knees to his chest. "Why do you want to know?" he asked uncertainly. "It's not like I behaved my best, and neither was she, but I'm not the one who's supposed to be avoiding stress."


Food orders placed, Xander crept up the stairs and sat on the floor, leaning into the door as he tried to hear what was going on inside.
 
"Because I care about you as well as her." Dark said, keeping his eyes on Alec, "Although if it comes to avoiding stress... Do you think, for someone like her, it makes it less stressful to be so often told what she cannot or should not do?" He leaned slightly forward, "But I did not come up here to tell you how wrong you were. I do think you made good points. But so did she. And even if you had not, and were altogether wrong, I still would want to know how you were feeling after."
 
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Alec shrugged. "I never said she couldn't do anything, only that she shouldn't, and not for her sake. What I don't understand is why she isn't more careful. It's selfish." He looked at Dark, trying to look more confident than he felt. "And I won't apologize for it." His chin trembled just a little, but he wouldn't back down on this point.
 
"Maybe it is..." Dark said slowly, "but health is not only physical, you know that. She has slowed down considerably, between the three of us we have taken most of her chores. Do you think she could be happy if she slowed to a stop? If she did nothing but be waited on? If she felt miserable and trapped, that would not be good for her or the baby either."
 
"She'll feel far more miserable if the baby dies," Alec pointed out bluntly. "I know rambunctious and eager and loves to do everything, and I like that about her and never think she can't do anything at all, except maybe color coordinate something, but it's only a few more months. Just a few! Why can't she just do something else for those few months? Why can't she just relax and enjoy being pampered before she has a baby she has to take care of day in and day out? She could do reading, music, a zen garden on her desk with sand, walking a bit if she feels up to it, sculpting, even playdoh! There are a lot of things you can do without straining your body or being able to see. Ask anyone in a wheelchair. I know she doesn't want to be coddled, but it's not just because of her. Very little of it is for her. It's for the Mini - I mean, baby - and after everything she's already been through, I want the baby to be okay. For your sake and hers. She can't just pretend like it's fine, like she can... can.. can go out and hoe the fields of corn or whatever else women used to do. For the baby's sake, she needs to be wrapped up in bubblewrap. Just for a few, short months."
 
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