Meh, I was bored. Felt like being an asshole because it's rarely done. probably gonna try and be less as time goes on. Sorry but i'm kinda new which isn't an excuse so I really need to apologize if i'm being dumb
 
Sorry bro but as writers, and this applies to everyone, our duty is to capture the beautiful and the ugly, the good and the bad in our world, and then express it with words. I want everyone here to be successful, but you can't do it that thinking a sloppy job or a spelling mistake is "good enough". To be a writer is to be a perfectionist.
 
Yeah I may have gone a bit too far just killing people but I didn't know how else to show him as just being a monster. I'm tryng to create a terrible person and humanize him as time goes on but I may have needed a build up. I'll try to proof read my posts more next time
 
But I don't really think the two other characters were being paranoid. Both of them are former Universe agents so they have to be wary
 
Weighing in my two cents: I agree with WiX's first post, but I figured the mistake was from inexperience. Having an asshole character is fun (I should know, I'm playing one), but having an asshole who is completely unrelatable and robotic? That doesn't give anyone else anything to work with. My advice would be to tone down the 'mindless killer' stuff, at least until there's actual battles to be had. Give him enough of a soul to be able to carry on a conversation, and you should be fine.
 
Name: Chojin Jackson
Alias/Nickname: Air Jordan
Age: 20
Gender: Male
Sexual Orientation: Straight

Sign: sigless

Bar Number: 628891 located on his left hand

Physical Appearance: Chojin has long black hair that covers on of his eyes and half of his eye while exposing one light blue eye. His clothes usually are a dark red jumpsuit with rockets apply to the back and sides while his socks are white along with white army boots to go with them.

Likes: Flying, Fighting, Building
Dislikes: Evil, Universe, Robots
Occupation: pilot and weapons dealer

Strengths: Long Range fighting and Close Range fighting
Weakness: cute girls and animals and Machine Empire Baranoia

Hobbies/ Other skills: reading

Weapon of Choice: King Sword: a sword that as a symbol that resembles air and King Gun: a blaster that shoots lasters. Finally King Smasher: the King Sword and King Blaster combined together and how to do it is that you flip the front of the King Gun and slide the King Sword into it making the King Smasher

History: when Chojin was 14 he invited a pair of Power Braces off of a complex technology that he had unknowingly stole from universe and transform in OH Red in which Universe had set their eyes on him. After 4 years of fighting Universe had recreate Machine Empire Baranoia to scare Chojin into giving up but that drove him into fighting harder but he have gone a fear of robots thanks to Universe.

Other- invited the Jetter Machines five motorcycles base off the one's on OHranger
 
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No one can "build anything to their desire", everything is flawed one way or the other so maybe just have him experienced in crafting but not quite able to make anything and everything. Also, his backstory seems a bit lacking.
 
Also in regards to the earlier discussion between Stoic and WiZ, I'm glad it was worked out. I do agree with WiZ, your character came off as robotic and the writing could be a bit better but that's why we're here, to have fun and grow as writers.
 
Alright full psycho it is then. I wanted them to be detached and uncaring to be a more nominal hero compared to everybody else but I see how a robot can be kinda boring.
 
Be careful with full psycho. You can't get through a whole story killing anything you feel like. And there's a way to be 'detatched and uncaring' while still being able to have realistic interactions. Basically just be careful. Don't tilt the scale too far either way, just make sure your character can be interacted with.
 
Yeah I'm not gonna kill people randomly when we get to the full swing of things. Probably just suggest plans with a lot of collateral. Gonna try and play him as someone with no value for human life or social etiquette unless it's needed. Stupid evil is stupid if the cons out value the pros
 
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